Ona Daniels
The arrival of a new baby can bring many changes to a family. Parents spend a lot of energy on preparations, and after the baby arrives, much of the family’s attention involves caring for the newborn.
So, it was for the Onwudinjos recently, when Marian Onwudinjo had her second child. The baby came seven years after her first shot at motherhood. Ama, her first child, had waited anxiously for the arrival of her younger one. For a long time, she has arranged some of the clothes she had outgrown. She had neatly kept away some of her toys and even shoes. These were all she wished to bequeath to her younger sibling.
Her mom had told me how much she liked to take care of babies, especially, new borns. She tends to them and cares for their needs, whenever they visit family friends or go to the church.
Mariam’s delivery was a huge surprise to me. We were together at a friend’s marriage anniversary the night before her delivery. We all had fun. The celebrant teased her because of her big tummy. She was quite active all through. She was delivered of a set of twin boys by 5.45am the following day.
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I visited them at their Okota residence when they returned from the hospital. Ama was literally over the moon. She desired to carry the babies at once. After the usual pleasantries, she told me of the progress in her music lesson. Ama is a talented girl. When her father noticed it, he started encouraging her. She plays the violin. In fact, in the church, she is a sight to behold among her peers.
“Aunty Editor, (that’s what her mother calls me.) Have you seen my babies? Do you know their name?
Yes, they are cute. I love them.” I responded. “Aaaah, so, you have given them names already?”
“Yes, na,” she cleverly shot back. “Their names are Tom and Jerry. I love them so much. I will carry them to the church. I will take them to my school. I will give them my bicycle to ride.”
“But they can’t ride the bicycle na? They are too small.”
“Ok na, so, I will carry them by myself.”
She ran off and emerged minutes later with her small box of clothes and toys. She struggled to bring them but her determination to show off her new siblings’ inheritance was evident.
“See my Spider Man wrist watch, see my teddy bear, see my Cinderella bag, see my Dora the great doll and see my Barbie.”
In sheer excitement, Ama had scattered the entire things all over the room. She moved on to the clothes. As she made to turn them out, her mother, who had watched from afar, jolted her with this question. “But they are boys na and they can’t wear your dress because you are a girl. I have told you that boys don’t wear girl’s dresses,” she told Ama.
Her face changed. Her mother and I knew that this route we were toeing was going to spoil Ama’s mood. Maraiam left us and returned to her room.
“But they are my babies na and I want to give them my clothes,” she said.
“Of course, nobody says they are not your babies. Not to worry, we shall go with you to shop for them.” I could see a hearty smile playing around her lips.
She turned to me to register her little grievances since the children came back. When she drew closer to me, I knew that she needed my attention. I was all ears. And she began, “Aunty Editor, do you know that mummy does not allow me to carry her babies?”
“Aaaah, they have suddenly become your mother’s babies but you told me a while ago that they are your babies and showed us all that you have kept for them?”
“Ehhn na but she doesn’t allow me to carry them na” This complaint was registered in a soft childish tone.
“Why na? Why does she not allow you? Does she not know that you are a big girl?”
“Ama baby, Amaco, the girl,” I managed to soothe her nerves with her pet names first. She immediately came back to cheerful self again but not completely satisfied.
She then ran into the room where her brothers and mother were sleeping. In excitement, she shook the babies’ crib as well as her mother.
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Poor Marian, before I could stop her, she had woken up. Marian hadn’t slept well since her discharge from the hospital. Taking care of new born babies is difficult but it is more stressful with twins. Her mom had arrived early for the Omugwo. They were expecting her mother-in-law in a few days.
“These kids are a handful at night but Ama is something else,” Marian had told me.
The situation was understandable. Ama wanted to be with the new kids but her mum, knowing her very well had been fencing her off, politely and diplomatically.
The new mother reluctantly stood up and ready to listen to Ama. “Oh, Ama baby, I wish you would just allow me some sleep?” She pleaded
“But mummy, you have been sleeping na? I want to go with you for shopping for my babies. Aunty Editor promised that we will go shopping for them. Hope you will take me?” Ama asked but Marian simply nodded
“And mummy, you said that they are boys and cannot wear my clothes. When are you going to bring me my baby girl sister?”
We laughed till we almost choked. The poor girl didn’t understand why we were laughing. For her, it was only logical that if you said the babies were boys and couldn’t wear her dresses, she needed a little baby girl sister to whom she would bequeath her small belongings.
And, of course, her mother promised to get her a little baby girl sister.
“When my daddy comes back from work, I will tell him that I want my baby girl sister tomorrow,” Ama announced, full of hope.
